Welcome to another edition of The Engine Room with Adam Miller from the Old Firm Facts podcast.
As always, we've got the latest Footsie Index revealing the best and the worst in Scottish football this week – including our verdict on the new Celtic Christmas advert.
And we've caught up with Kilmarnock star Oli Shaw to quiz him about everything cars. Buying a car? Don’t just nail it, cinch it cinch.co.uk
Now let's kick off the Footsie Index…
October 3: “Ryan Porteous let his manager and team-mates down today” – Steven Gerrard.
October 21: “Do I look happy?… Don’t ask silly questions then” – Steven Gerrard.
November 21: “Do we look happy? Don’t ask silly questions then” – Ryan Porteous, whose Hibs side had just beaten Rangers 3-1 at Hampden.
Like a stand-up trying to hold it together before the punchline their whole set’s been building to, you could actually see the smirk forming as Porteous was about to say it.
14 successful years in Glasgow under his belt, it was understandable that Scott Brown would seek a different challenge.
He’s found that in Aberdeen, where he continues to wear a captain’s armband while applying his experience to a new environment.
Moving on has, however, deprived Brown of his most important role.
Celtic released their latest Christmas ad on Tuesday, and for the first time ever it didn’t feature an Oscar-worthy Scott Brown cameo…
Arbroath’s surprise 1-0 win at Rugby Park against Kilmarnock put them just two points behind the league leaders.
In most circumstances, that would mean they’re now competing at the top of the table. In Scottish football, however, “most circumstances” is a term that rarely applies.
The top five teams in Scotland’s second tier are all separated by just two points, with Killie and Raith Rovers on 29, Caley Thistle on 28 and Partick Thistle sharing Arbroath’s 27-point tally.
The top five’s tightness makes it all the more bizarre that the Red Lichties and Dunfermline (in fifth and sixth) are 14 points apart.
The bottom five, meanwhile, are separated by a solitary point.
Back pages might be focusing on Solskjaer and the Champions League this week, but they’re looking in the wrong place.
With Partick Thistle’s iconic mascot Kingsley, cult hero Dick Campbell and now these strange point gaps, the Scottish Championship is the real centre of football’s universe.
In the driving seat
Q: What was your first car?
A: Vauxhall Corsa – all white with blacked out rims on the wheels.
Q: What do you drive now?
A: Mercedes-Benz GLC. I got it when I was at Ross County and coming up and down the A9, so it was a comfort thing for me.
Q: If you were a car which car would you be?
A: I enjoy watching Formula 1 and Lando Norris, so I’d like to try and drive his F1 car.
Q: What’s your best-ever driving experience?
A: Heading from Edinburgh to Kilmarnock with Robbo [Scott Robinson], Dylan [McGowan] and Blair [Alston] is a fun journey.
Q: Favourite road journey?
A: The road from Edinburgh to Inverness is nice, especially in winter with the scenic views.
Q: Who’s your dream passenger?
A: Carpool Karaoke is a good laugh, so James Corden would be entertaining
The Cult Heroes of Scottish Football: Graeme Murty
There may have been more coverage of Steven Gerrard’s exit, but of the Rangers managers who left Ibrox this month it’s Graeme Murty who could end up being more fondly remembered.
When Mark Warburton left in February 2017, it was Murty who stepped in as caretaker.
When Pedro Caixinha left in October 2017, it was Murty who stepped in as caretaker.
Like a more staunch Commissioner Gordon, Rangers just kept sending out the Murty Signal when they needed saving.
Five years of working with the under-20s as head coach; stepping up to the big dugout when called…but what does the rest of the world think of when they hear the name “Graeme Murty”?
The time he became a meme during a defeat against Dundee by performing a headstand.
If you’re reading this in Manchester, look out of your window and you may just see the Murty Signal emanating from Old Trafford…
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